The She-Lecher

I pressed the lift button and waited. The LCD screen above showed that the lift had descended from the 20th floor and stopped on the 16th. Somebody was getting onto the lift on that floor. I glanced at my watch. It was 8.20am. My eyes remained on the LCD screen as the lift slowly descended again and made its way toward my floor. I adjusted my bag's strap on my shoulders and got ready. The lift was finally here. It was time to get moving.

The doors to the lift opened to reveal a rather peculiar looking old lady. She had messy shoulder length hair and glasses that was half way down her nose. I must say she did look like she had a few screws loose in her head though. She stood standing lop sided in the corner of the lift and stared at me patronizingly. I ignored her and stepped into the lift. Little did I know that the lift ride was going to be the longest one ever as I pressed the 'door close' button.

As the lift slowly descended from the 5th floor, I felt a pair of eyes studying me closely. I looked at the old bat beside me and felt extremely uncomfortable with the way she was starring. I saw her eyes run up and down my body slowly. What a sick old lady she was! What is wrong with this lunatic? Oh yeah, she's crazy but isn't she a woman herself? I was wearing dress pants and a long sleeved blouse. There was nothing revealing about it. I tried to ignore her and looked at the lift's LCD screen. It was only the 4th floor but the lift seemed to be taking forever to get down! She whistled and I flinched. I looked at her angrily but she continued to stare lewdly.

Eeeeeeee! I would have liked to hit her with my bag but on second thoughts, what if she was my mother's friend? It's supposed to be normal to have weird people in my neighbourhood but this was one of my worst encounters ever. Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! I made a mental note to ask my mother if she knew any old ladies from the 16th floor when I get home.

I felt so relieved when we reached the ground floor. The she-lecher headed for the nearby shops and I quickly hurried off toward the train station. It bothered me so much that I couldn't stop thinking of the incident for days. She's a crazy old bat, get over it, I told myself but I couldn't. It would be miracle to finally move out of this neighbourhood one day and I would really like to move to a better one. I've always missed our old home. Sigh...

I had a few other encounters with the she-lecher after that. I bumped into her at the void deck once but I quickly walked off and zig zagged among the pillars to avoid her stares. The second time I saw her in the lift again (I had a complete déjà vu feeling of how it was when lift door opened the last time), I gave it a miss and waited for the next ride. I swore I would never get into the same lift with her again. Ever!

I soon developed certain paranoia for this she-lecher. Every morning I would check if the lift stopped on the 16th floor before it stopped on my floor. And every evening when I got back, I would look out for her from a distance so that I could take a different route and avoid her. Gosh! Am I slowly becoming like one of the weirdoes in this place? Please tell me I'm normal!

Ok that's it for this yucky tale of the she-lecher. So until I save up for a better place in the future, wish me luck in avoiding this crazy old bat around this neighbourhood. Eeeeeewwwww!

Year One

Verdict of the theatre
I watched this show on 27 August 2009 at Eng Wah, Suntec City at 3.10pm. (Theatre 3) The theatre was very cramp. The row in front was very close to my row and I had little leg room to stretch my legs in front. Fortunately it was the off peak hour (office hour) and my row was empty so I could turn either to the left or right to stretch. After the movie, My knees felt stiff and it took a while for me to be able to get up and walk down the stairs properly.

The Plot
It's quite a comedy with some explicit jokes. Year One is a comedy about the old testament in the bible with some its stories being stretched and told in rather a creative way. It's about two cavemen Zed and Oh meeting some familiar characters such as Adam, Eve, Cain, Abel, Abraham and Isaac. The story is written by the guy who brought you the Ghostbusters and the one played the role of Splegler ( I can't spell his name but I know his character collects moulds, spores and fungus in that movie).

Verdict of the Movie
Although I had a good laugh in the movie and found the story very creative, it wasn't a movie that left the same impression I had as The Hangover. Perhaps the writer was trying to include too many details into the main storyline. I don't know but it just doesn’t have that much of a wow factor for me.

In this movie, the protagonist's objective is to leave his village and explore the world. Along the way he discovers that world was not flat at all. Somewhere at the beginning of the story, there was some mention that the world is flat and that it rested on the back of a giant turtle in space. Now does that sound familiar? (I'm also a fan of Terry Pratchett's books, hee hee!) The usual boy likes girl but girl prefers someone else line is also included in this movie along with the zero to hero storyline.

I shall give a rating of 5 out of 10 for this movie. It's just so-so.

The Suicide

It was just another day. I was having my breakfast one morning when we heard a very loud noise outside the building. It wasn't unusual to hear loud noises downstairs. Our neighbourhood is hardly peaceful anyway. Sometimes car horns might just sound continuously or there were would be the blaring of car alarms. Even vans loading and unloading stuff in the car park may make a din while they transport their goods to the nearby coffee shop and provision shops. Oh and not to mention, we would sometimes hear the screeching and howling of some aunties and uncles at the Karaoke Corner below because we have a residents corner on the ground floor. We were just used to this noisy neighbourhood no matter what time of the day it was. So although it was just 7am in the morning, we weren't in the least bit perturbed by the loud noise that morning.

My dad was just back from his jog when he announced that somebody had committed suicide. The person had jumped from the eighteenth floor from our block and the police had sealed off an area of the courtyard below with yellow tape and covered the body with a canvas.

I remembered going to work that morning thinking to myself what a miserable neighbourhood this place is. There is always a funeral here every month because there are many senior citizens in this area. I've often wondered when I would be able to move to a better neighbourhood at all.

It wasn't until I got back from work that I learnt the identity of the victim. My heart sank when I heard the tragic story. It turned out to be the old lady who lived on the sixth floor right above us. She was ninety, depended on a walking stick to move around but otherwise she was still looking healthy. I had met her in the lift a few times. She was friendly and tried to make some conversation with me whenever we met. I often felt awkward in front of her because I always never know what to say to someone I hardly know. Nevertheless I stayed polite and replied with a few words and smiled. All that while, she didn't appear to be troubled at all.

According to the cleaner, she had seen this old lady having her breakfast at the coffee shop before taking a lift up to our block. A few minutes later, she jumped from the 18th floor. This old lady had lived with her son who had stopped talking to her for a long time.

Perhaps she was tired of living. Perhaps she was lonely. At 90, most of her friends had probably crossed over to another place by now. But isn't it a waste to end it off just like that? Not many people can make it to 90 years of age. My last conversation with her was just 2-3 weeks before her death. If I had known she was so lonely, if I had known that she merely wanted a friend to talk to, I would have spoken to her a bit more. If only, if only...

Life is unpredictable. Look around you, at your friends and family. Each day is a precious gift from God. Spend more time with your family and friends when you can. Sigh... isn't it sad?

The Hangover

The Theatre:

I watched this movie on Monday, 10th August 2009 at Eng Wah -Toa Payoh at 3.15pm. It has been years since I've stepped into a neighbourhood theatre and the place seemed rather rundown and old. Although it was a public holiday, there were many seats still available during that time. It wasn't the movie but rather the location because my friend who had a caught the same movie in town found the theatre crowded over there.

Summary of Plot:

This story is about four guys going to Vegas to have a bachelors party but end up waking up the next morning with no memories of what happened the night before. The story is pretty hilarious and I would say that this is a guys kind of movie. Nevertheless I had enjoyed the movie all the same.

The groom had invited his two best friends, one a dentist and the other a school teacher together with his brother-in-law-to-be, the underdog character. Unknown to them, the underdog spikes their drinks thinking it is Ecstasy when it is actually Roofus. When the guys wake up the next morning, they find the groom missing, a tiger sitting in the bathroom, a baby in the closet, a tooth missing in the dentist's mouth and a hospital bracelet on the school teacher's wrist.

As the story progresses, the dentist discovers he had also married a stripper the night before, they had stolen a police car and that they had gambled and won $80,000 but the money is missing and some thugs are after them. And to make matters worse, the groom is missing and they have to find him and get him back in time for his wedding. There were many more shocks along the way too. Watch how these guys try their best to retrace their steps and finally remember where they had left the groom the night before. It was quite a laugh.

The Characters:

Bradly Cooper is looking good in this movie. I don't really know the names of the other actors but I know that they are all comedians from other shows. The groom is played by the guy who acted in National Treasure (both movies).

The groom has only a minor role in the movie. You'll only see him at the beginning and the end of the story because he is missing throughout most of the story and the guys can't remember where they had left him the night before.

The underdog character may appear silly and not very smart at the beginning of the story but he'll turn out to be quite a smart guy at the casino where they try to win another round of $80,000 and succeed in order to save the groom whom they thought was abducted by the thugs.

The dentist is this guy who is planning to marry his long time girlfriend who hen pecks him and he has to lie about his trip to Vegas with the guys. During his drunken spree, he ended up marrying a stripper and was challenged by the underdog to pull out his own tooth to prove that he is a good dentist. In the end, this dentist will leave his girlfriend and give it a chance with the stripper.

The school teacher is this guy who is married and has a son. He is the charm of the team and appears to be the 'leader' of the group.

At the end of the story, the guys recover a camera and see the pictures they took the night below. They make a pack to delete the pictures and never speak of the stuff they did in Vegas.

My Views:

Have you ever wondered why of all the nights, guys choose to fool around with women especially during their bachelor party? I mean why bother getting married in the first place if they treasure their single-hood so much? Shouldn't a guy be truth to his wife or wife to be at all times? Trust is important. But these are just my conservative views. I guess Americans are more open minded in such stuff and their brides don't mind. Whatever...

Happy National Day!!!

Hey there, I'm now watching the NDP2009 on television and surfing the net at the same time. So far the show has been spectacular.

Wow!! They're playing really cool music right now.


HAPPY NATIONAL DAY FOLKS!

Cheers.